Water, Blood & Oil

Joseph Smith and the Devil Have a Beer With Mammy Brewster

Posted in Uncategorized by Tod Robbins on February 14, 2010

A clever dialogue written by Apostle Parley P. Pratt and published January 1, 1844, in the New York Herald was A Dialogue between Joseph Smith and the Devil. One of the most interesting among many many subjects in this fictitious encounter is the following:

[29] Devil: Well, Mr. Smith, we have talked a long while, and are agreed at last–you are a noble and generous fellow, and would not bring a railing accusation against even a poor old Devil, nor cheat him one cent. Come, it is a warm day, and I feel as though it is my treat. Let us go down to Mammy Brewer’s cellar and take something to drink.

[30] Smith: Agreed, Mr. Devil, you appear very generous now. (They enter the cellar together)

[31] Devil: Good morning, Mrs. Brewer, I make you acquainted with my good friend, Mr. Smith, the prophet.

[32] Landlady: Why Mr. Devil, is that you? Sit down, you’re tired; but you don’t say that this is Mr. Smith, your mortal enemy? I am quite surprised; what will you have, gentlemen, for if you can drink together, I think all the world ought to be friends.

[33] Devil: As we are both temperance men and ministers, I think perhaps a glass of spruce beer apiece will be alright; what say you Mr. Smith?

[34] Smith: As you please your majesty. (They take the beer)

[35] Devil: (Holding up glass) Come, Mr. Smith, your good health. I propose we offer a toast.

[36] Smith: Well proceed.

[37] Devil: Here’s to my good friend, Joe Smith, may all sorts of ill-luck befall him, and may he never be suffered to enter my kingdom, either in time or eternity, for he would almost make me forget that I am a devil, and make a gentleman of me, while he gently overthrows my government at the same time that he wins my friendship.

[38] Smith: Here to his Satanic Majesty; may he be driven from the earth and be forced to put to sea in a stone canoe with an iron paddle, and may the canoe sink, and a shark swallow the canoe and its royal freight and an alligator swallow the shark and may the alligator be bound in the northwest corner of hell, the door be locked, key lost, and a blind man hunting for it.

The entire text can be found at BYU’s Mormon Literature Database here.


3 Responses

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  1. The Hunter said, on August 29, 2012 at 8:02 pm

    Er… is thast fair?

    • The Hunter said, on August 29, 2012 at 8:03 pm

      Er… I meant …Is that fair?

  2. Tod Robbins said, on August 29, 2012 at 9:12 pm

    Is what fair?

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